I have come to realise that there are two fundamental problems with my blog. First, as I lamented in my post Single Mother? Ditch the Label , I am not just a single mother. I am many other things and many other people. There is more to me than having a son and not being in a relationship. It loses its blog identity and its blog voice. This blog is all over the place.
Secondly, and this is probably more important, is the fact that www. There are some good reasons why this is an anonymous blog: I can be honest, totally honest; I can tell you about my ex; I can write exactly how I feel, but most importantly I can do so without too much worry that my son or his father will ever find out. I can maintain the happy co-parenting facade in front of my son and let him believe that he has the best daddy in the world.
My son deserves that. The disadvantages of an anonymous blog however are that it is much more difficult to publicise both the blog and yourself. I really enjoy blogging. I really enjoy writing. I would like to let this blog take me somewhere. So, where does this leave us and what does it mean for this blog? To be honest I am not entirely sure, but I think I have three options: I could cleanse this blog of the negativity and hence some of the crushing honesty and de-risk my identity becoming public and my ex, my friends and my family all finding out.
I think it would also mean that I could use the blog to promote myself a bit. I would branch out, focus less on being a single mother and write what I really want to write. This blog needs a bit of an overhaul anyway. I could start a new blog, put thesingleswan. But there's something not quite right. Perhaps he's got a lot to say about the menu or is critiquing the clothes of passers-by.
And when he asks you again where you're from, your age and appears to make a mental note of your eye colour, you need to beware. There's every chance you could be sitting across from the scourge of the internet: Identity agony The true cross that every anonymous blogger has to bear is that most people don't know or indeed care who they are.
For some bloggers, this adds to the mystery and appeal and so they value their anonymity yes, I'm talking about me now , but others regret that their face sits behind a paywall that nobody is going to shell out the pennies to peek behind. That their genius will remain undiscovered or that they'll never receive recognition for their toil is a constant source of worry. They consider 'coming out' and revealing all to much fanfare, realising it's the only way to realising their ambition of getting a publishing deal for a toilet book of their Tweets out in time for Christmas, without taking into account that it's the anonymity which makes them interesting.
Whether they're the kind of scribe who slates restaurants or drones about fashion, every single sight and sound is potential content for their wry musings. With an armchair movie reviewer, for example, the pleasure of a date to the cinema would be destroyed with every tut and deep sigh, along with the fuzzy glow of your blogging beau's iPhone being removed from his pocket so he can tap out some withering notes about Keira Knightley's similarity to a pine summer house.
Everyone's a critic, yes, but perhaps your other half could leave the fault-finding eye - let alone the gushing superfan plaudits - at home for the evening. Automatic fanboy Being their nearest and dearest - no matter how much your enthusiasm might be dwindling - you are of course expected to be their number one devotee.
When they ask you if you have read their latest tirade against the state of the London Underground or their new blog about Blackpool Fashion Week, don't let the panic shoot all the way up from your gut to your eyes. Pretend that you did, make your excuses as quickly as possible and adjourn to the nearest toilet and get busy with your smartphone - and pray it's only a short essay.
Alternatively, if you're feeling a bit argumentative and are looking for an afternoon more interesting than discussing what your paramour thought of the sausages in the local cafes he's reviewing for his fucking super-amazing blog, confess you haven't read it and probably won't, because the last one wasn't your "cup of tea". If there's one thing a nameless scribe can't abide, it's being compared to a cup of English Breakfast.
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My anonymous blog has an identity crisis
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