When anyone makes this weighty statement super-early in a relationship, it raises questions about whether or not the person is genuine or just caught up in the moment. While early relationship feels and hormones can be intoxicating, relationship experts warn that it might be a red flag if you or your partner is too quick to say, "I love you.
Tessina, psychotherapist and author of Love Styles: How to Celebrate Your Differences. You haven't been dating for at least three to six months Of course, there are always exceptions, like if you've been spending every waking minute together versus only seeing each other once or twice a week. But in general, if you say, "I love you," before dating for three to six months, you could be mistaking love for something else.
I wouldn't feel really confident if someone is saying it before six months because what they are is infatuated," says sociologist Pepper Schwartz, a professor at the University of Washington and the author of The Surprising Secrets of Happy Couples. You haven't had sex yet If you haven't yet slept together and someone says, "I love you," watch out. It could be a ploy to get you into bed.
Tessina says a person may say, "I love you," during sex or to obtain sex, but they might not have really thought it through or mean it. If you're the one who said it because you were caught up in the moment, you might want to crack a joke about how great the romp was that it made you exaggerate a little. According to a study, " Relationship Formation on The Internet: What's The Big Attraction?
This was the case for Amanda Goldstein Marks, 35, who met her future husband Aaron in via Jewish dating site JDate. In the beginning, Amanda signed up for the site without any intention of going on dates, she only wanted to look at her cousin's pictures. But soon after putting up her profile, sans photos, she met Aaron, who was drawn to the mention of Jewish summer camp on her page. Amanda talked with Aaron for months, without seeing any pictures of him, before the couple finally met -- like Jon and Katie, at an airport -- when he returned from summer vacation to attend college.
A year later, by which point they were officially dating, the two discovered that their grandmothers had attended the same Jewish summer camp in Cleveland, Ohio, a strange coincidence considering Amanda grew up in Alabama and Aaron in New Mexico. Why traditional dating is dead Love can be blind -- literally Amanda's attraction to a man she had never seen before is not uncommon: One of the most famous is 's ominous-sounding " Deviance In The Dark ," in which interactions between students were observed in both pitch-dark and well-lit rooms.
Those who met in the dark room, on the whole, were much more open and intimate with their fellow participants than those who met face-to-face under the fluorescents. When you get rid of all the stress attached to face-to-face meetings, people feel more free to be themselves and get to know each other. That approach worked for Keith A. Masterson, 41, and Gabriel-Thomas Masterson, After meeting via a Facebook group comment chain, the couple spent hours daily chatting on Facebook and the phone before meeting two months later.
The couple are now married and living in Colonial Heights, Virginia.
5 Signs You’ve Found A Winner On An Online Dating Site (No Sarcasm!)
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